Financial Moves For Mothers Who Are Not Married
by Caitlyn Driehorst
Caitlyn Driehorst is a financial advisor at RightWise Wealth, as well as the firm's founder and CEO. Caitlyn began her career at the Boston Consulting Group and held strategy roles at MGM Resorts, Capital Group American Funds and two venture-backed wealth startups. She holds a B.A. from the University of Chicago and an M.B.A. from UC Berkeley's Haas School of Business.
Published: April 17, 2026
I recently partnered with an amazing executive coach who works with ambitious mothers – Kelly Ling of Stork & Spark – for a webinar on transitional years for mothers.
We take pride in being a pretty progressive firm; this isn’t just because of our ideals (though that, too); it’s just practical for our client base, which includes a true “this is the future liberals want” for the many ways that love can make a family.
Nevertheless, just to be practical for the minutes of speaking time, this webinar was pretty focused on traditional 1950s-style nuclear families, since marriage is such a huge driver of tax nuance. 84% of mothers who live with their children and also have a four-year degree (you don’t have to come for me, I come for myself) are married. (Pew Research.)
But 84% isn’t 100%, and it bugs me to leave important people to an asterisk. Since our speaking time was limited in the session, I created a handout specifically for mothers who aren’t married, and I’m happy now to adapt it for a blog post.
So this one is for you, mothers who aren’t married:
You may be in a long-term relationship or domestic partnership with your child’s parent, but not married
You may share custody with another parent
You may be your child’s only parent, by choice or otherwise
I polled our team of financial advisors for ideas for you, and here’s what we’d want you to know:
You may qualify for “Head of Household” filing, which can be more attractive than filing as Single
Tax benefits include:
Higher standard deduction: As HOH, your standard deduction is $24,150 rather than $16,100 for single. That’s an additional $8,050 shielded from taxes. (2026 numbers)
“Fatter” brackets: More of your income will slot into lower-taxed brackets before being pushed into higher marginal rates
As a knock-on benefit, HOH income is more likely to qualify for income-based tax credits, such as the child tax credit and earned income tax credit
To qualify for HOH, you must:
Be unmarried
Pay more than half of your household costs
Have a dependent relative living with you for more than half a year
If you share parenting with an unmarried parent, you can’t both claim HOH, even if you share more than one child and live separately
If you are filing HOH, you probably want to engage a tax professional for your return, rather than going it alone via TurboTax etc.; there’s a lot of nooks and crannies here
If you are the single earner for your children, you need to maintain a greater emergency fund and disability insurance than a mother with redundancy to household income
Emergency Fund: Hold onto extra cash in case you were laid off or couldn’t work. 6 - 9 months’ expenses would be a minimum, and 12 months may be preferred, depending on the nature of your work
Disability Insurance:
Don’t assume that you could qualify for Social Security if you were disabled. The process can take months or years, requires legal costs, and is subject to bureaucratic idiosyncrasies
You’ll want to understand short-term vs long-term protection; whether your policy covers any occupation or work in your occupation; and how long you’d be disabled before benefits would kick in
If you are self-employed or your employer does not provide coverage, you may be able to access cheaper rates via a professional member association
Life Insurance: Your coverage should cover the costs your children would need until at least age 18 (or through college), and you should ensure the beneficiary is a trust rather than going directly to minor children. Term life insurance (rather than whole life insurance) is usually our starting-place recommendation, and $1M is a common rule-of-thumb for minimum coverage, though your needs may vary
Your estate planning is especially important, to protect your children.
You’ll need airtight documents for medical decision-making for your own interests, and should evaluate guardianship and trust documents to protect your children
You should also document your finances, child’s information carefully in a binder or someplace easily discoverable, in case something were to happen to you suddenly
At RightWise, our financial planning fee includes basic end-of-life documents via a legal doc generator that we pay for; we can also help tee you up for work with an attorney, so you get the “dumb questions” out of the way before the hourly billing starts ticking
Other items:
If you have significant uncovered medical expenses (e.g., fertility treatments for single-mother-by-choice) consider itemizing your taxes that year and “batching” other expenses. Consult a tax professional.
If you are amicably co-parenting with someone to whom you are not married, and together you are considering investing for child’s college expenses (yay!) consider having the lower-earning parent “own” the 529 account, as the FAFSA may view the child’s need more favorably and thus provide more need-based aid, under this arrangement. (Want to learn more about 529s? Request a copy of our book, “Front-Load Your 529.”)
And if you’d like to speak with a financial advisor who sees you and likes you, reach out for a conversation. We like to think that we are good villagers.
